07.11.2009 12:51
IMG_4452. Cleveland, OH.

IMG_4452. Cleveland, OH.

05.16.2009 18:29 / 8 notes

Is it classist to want to date/marry someone who has a college degree?

unicornery:

For myself, I don’t need to date/marry a rich man; I just think that finishing college correlates with intelligence and the ability to stick with something and see it through. Plus there’s the old “we’d have more in common” (the fairly bogus excuse often used by people as to why they wouldn’t date outside their race).

I have dated men who dropped out of school, and I have never turned down a date with someone because of his educational status.  Would I rather date an unemployed guy with a Bachelor’s, or a dropout with a job?  Hard to say, as long as neither one had kids.

I think this is a more complicated issue than can possibly be addressed in 140 characters. First of all, yes, it is classist. But marriage is about a lot more than just your personal compatibility with people. Its a economic, social, cultural etc relationship. Class, race, gender, and other privilege differences are hard. They make your relationships harder, and they make the amount of work and effort to maintain those relationships harder (as if maintaining a long term relationship with another person or other people isn’t hard as it is..). Having a college education doesn’t really speak to your intelligence, your ability to work hard, or your ability to stick with something. It often points to your parent’s class status, the determination of those around you to have you stick with something, or a plethora of other things. Plenty of smart, hard working people don’t go to college. Plenty of lazy people who aren’t as smart as they think they are do. I would be tempted to say that people who don’t go to college are probably even more familiar with hard work than those who do. There’s plenty of hard work that doesn’t occur in libraries, or in cubicles.

I think that this expectation, or this desire in a partner, would be better framed in terms of actual characteristics, rather than in terms of educational achievements. There is nothing wrong with wanting a hardworking, determined, intelligent partner. There is nothing with wanting to spend time with people with whom you have things in common. What is wrong is correlating these traits with class/race/gender presentations, privileges and identities with which they have no actual correlation.

01.02.2009 10:07

Cutting across the forecourt on one occasion, as members of the college were entitled to do, he was accosted by a porter and escorted to the door. Only when Maley showed a matriculation card did the porter back down and apologise profusely. Maley was “uncertain as to whether I was more angry at being manhandled or at the grovelling that followed on from the revealing of my true identity as a future member of the ruling class”.

It’s right posh in t’common room, innit? [via]

10.22.2008 19:50

And there’s the rub. We love learning. We hate school. What’s worse is that many of us hate school because we love learning.

Revisiting “A Vision of Students Today”

08.22.2008 08:56

Understand the difference between your personal work, and your classroom practice.

10 Ways to Survive Art School

08.16.2007 15:43

Are there more black men in college or in jail?
Janks Morton, a new movie director, is willing to bet you got the wrong answer. Although he thinks the very nature of the question is an “abomination,” he wonders: Would that same question be asked so often of any other race in America? The very premise of the question, he said, leads to faulty science. But the question is insidious, like the images that have seeped into the public psyche so deep that many black people themselves don’t get the answer right. …
In 2005, according to the Census Bureau, 864,000 black men were in college. According to Justice Department statistics, 802,000 were in federal and state prisons and jails, Morton said.
Between the ages of 18 and 24, black men in college outnumber those incarcerated by 4 to 1.
Still, the idea that the opposite is true stems from an image that has been perpetuated, Morton said, by the government, the media and the black leadership.

Filmmaker tries to debunk labels of black men

07.27.2007 22:21

Personally, I think it would only be fair to allow women unfettered access to higher education for the next 100 years or so, and routinely block men’s access — either by outright refusing their entrance or by reminding them of how inferior they are or by continually telling them that they “can’t have it all” and if they want a life and a job then they need to choose now (and of course emphasize that the morally sound choice is the “life”).
Put the majority of house and child-care responsibilities on men’s shoulders. Then structure domestic work policy in a way that makes it incredibly difficult for men to have enough time, money and energy to raise their kids and continue working full-time. Guilt them for being bad employees and bad parents. If they decide to stay home, tell them that they’re letting their brains turn to jelly and that they’re a disgrace to the Brotherhood. If they decide to work full-time, tell them that their children are deprived, and will inevitably grow up to be serial killers. And if they have the audacity to demand flexible work schedules so that they can balance their lives, guilt them some more about straining the resources of their workplace and asking for special treatment. Accuse them of being socialists.
Then allow women access not only to higher education, but also to the better-paying blue-collar jobs — and tell men that, unfortunately, no one in their right mind would trust a man to fix their car or their plumbing. Women have the small nimble fingers and the fine motor skills necessary to put all those little parts together. Don’t blame me, it’s just biology. And when men start to call bullshit, question their sexuality, their physical attractiveness, and their sanity.

Shorter Dinesh D’Souza: Affirmative action is ok if it helps white guys

06.23.2007 19:13

“Through the Same Door,” part one

06.23.2007 19:13

“Through the Same Door,” part two

06.23.2007 19:13

“Through the Same Door,” part three